#30 (Something to Chew On)

At one point in my life

I sat in front of the TV

Dreaming that it’d be me

Spreading the joy that I once felt

But life is more complex than a dream

Matched only in its confusion

Roads diverge at points without means

Only to meet up at a point most advantageous to those above

At another point

I wondered if it were possible to even choose a road

If the destination is the same

Does variation in journey matter?

A point shortly thereafter

I felt as though the journey is what allows for the destinations meaning

So, I sped up to 80

Attempting to get there as fast as I could

Red lights and stop signs only seemed like suggestions

I missed moment after moment passing me by

A premature ending was almost my fate

But premature is something I was all too familiar with

Fire drill versus Lock-down

Who really wins in the end

When none of it can prepare you for the real thing

Another moment

I found myself stuck at the end of a cul de sac

In a neighborhood marked for development

Circles and circles I went

Watching the same patterns lock me in place

Left and right couldn’t be right

Passively waiting for the road to change

As red signs were built all around me

Until a way out seemed impossible

The next moment

I pushed the gas pedal through the floor

Ripping out of the cul de sac at the speed of sound

Destroying the neighborhood they built around me

An inferno rest in my wake

Burning up the dreams of the lives dependent on me

A high-speed collision into a non-existent bridge

Sent me flying out of my seat through the front windshield

In this moment

I stand in the creek

Picking shards of glass out of my hands and knees

Unsure of which way to go

Feeling the river flow past me

I journey up against the current

Where I can build my own village

Untouched by the needs of those down stream

A village of isolatory bliss

Can only last for so long

So, I sit here squeezing the arm rests of my throne

Waiting for that car to barrel through all that I’ve built